You are born into a nightmare world of post-apocalypse. The dead have arisen and are everywhere. [[Search your pack]] [[Head north, into a forest]] [[Head south, into a city]] [[Head east, into the desert]] [[Head west, into a wasteland]]Your pack has a few things in it. A can of food, a jar of clear water, a torch. You get the sense that you can carry thousands of pounds of equipment, and that it will all fit in your backpack. [[Great.]]It's a nice forest, with trees in it, and rolling hills. [[Punch some sticks and grass, pick up a rock, make a stone axe.]]Ah, the big city. Lots of zombies here. Look, some dogs. [[The dogs kill you.|die]]The wide open desert, nothing like it. [[You die of both starvation and thirst before you find anything.|die]]It's very wastey. Lots of remnants of buildings, and nothing much to pick up except gray cinderblocks. [[Pick up some cinderblocks.]] [[Don't pick up some cinderblocks.]] [[Die of boredom.|die]]I know, huh? Except you're still in a zombie wasteland. [[start]]You feel somewhat accomplished with your new stone axe. There is a zombie nearby. Perhaps it would like to "axe" you a question? That is a lumber-based joke. [[Hit the zombie with the axe.]] [[Avoid the zombie.]] [[Run away.]]The zombie somehow hits you instead, his reach is surprisingly longer than yours, even though you wield an axe. You keep trying, in a step forward-step backward routine, until your axe is half-destroyed, and decide to just run away. [[Run away.]]Yeah, that doesn't work. This is a really smart zombie.You easily outrun the zombie. You see a log cabin, with zombies around it. It might provide some shelter, if you clear it out. On the other hand, maybe you should move on. [[Fight one of the zombies.|Hit the zombie with the axe.]] [[Try to sneak around the zombies and break into the cabin.]] [[This forest sucks.|start]]You break a window to get into the cabin, since all the doors are locked. The zombies detect this, of course, and quickly break the door down with their bare hands. [[Fight one of the zombies.|Hit the zombie with the axe.]] [[Retreat to the second floor.]]You backtrack to the second floor, but the zombies find you. Trapped, you break a window and leap out, breaking your leg. The other zombies outside find you and kill you, and you die. [[Guess I'm dead, then.|die]]You respawn back where you first came into this world, only your backpack is now empty. You sense that it is far off somewhere, but you're not sure where. Wasn't much in it anyway. [[start]]Soon, your backpack bulges not even slightly as it shoulders the burden of the thousands of pounds of cinderblocks you have opted to carry. [[Stop picking up cinderblocks.|Don't pick up some cinderblocks.]]As your stomach rumbles, you decide that picking up cinderblocks is not a fruitful activity. You find a handgun and some bullets in a kitchen sink, for some reason. This brightens you somewhat. [[I feel like a real man now!]] You have acquired a bit of a wasteland strut, now, with the handgun strapped in the waistband of your jockey shorts. And not a moment too soon. You see three female zombies, each of identical height and with large, full, undead breasts. One is wearing a perfectly clean cocktail dress, another is in an absurd interpretation of a nurse's uniform (complete with bit red crosses and a pillbox cap), and the third is in a cheerleader's uniform. Perhaps the destroyed building nearby was once a strip club. [[Well, hello ladies!]] [[Prepare to die!]] [[Run away from the female zombies.]]They don't say anything back, except for the low grunts and groans you normally associate with zombies. [[Why can't I get a break?]]You actually don't give them that much time to prepare and just start shooting. Two of them die, and the third hits you hard enough to stun you. [[Start bleeding.]] [[Don't start bleeding.]]You decide to save your ammunition for now, and run away. Then you run into some dogs, against whom the gun is mostly useless, and they bark and snap and totally bite you a whole bunch of times. [[Die.|die]]It's the zombie apocalypse, and you didn't read the wiki, that's why. Anyway, some dogs bite you to death or something. [[die]]Great, you're bleeding. You run from the last zombie, your heartbeat in your ears. [[Apply your only bandage.]] [[Don't apply your only bandage.|die]]The zombie hits you again, and you're stunned. She hits you again, and you start bleeding. [[Start bleeding.]]You apply your only bandage. Whew! The female zombie hits you again, and you die. [[die]]